It's official, I'm a crazy magnet. As soon as I decide to give up on finding a relationship the wackoes come out of the woodwork and find me. What is it that I have that makes me desirable to the unstable? I didn't ask for any of this.

If you recall way back when, about two years ago. I moved into a house with the guy that saved my life once upon a time. It was a good house with the possible exception that neither of my roomates thought twice about living in filth. I'll admit that I'm not the world cleanest person, but I don't let the trash pile up in my kitchen. I don't let mold grow in the back of the toilet or on the dishes that are piled in the sink. My ex-roomates on the other hand were only too ready to put up with such things. I found that out when I went on a month and a half cleaning strike. The garbage piled up. And then it piled higher until Bree and Kevin came by one day. When Bree said something about the smell I decided that the experiment was over. But the house was never the same.

About two months ago our landlord came to us and said he was going to let his daughter live in the house while she's at school, this meant we had to leave. I ended up finding a place with my friends Tom and Christina. They were once an item, but not any longer. This is my fault, but we'll get to that in a bit. We share the house with Moppy and Thomas right now and will be getting one more roomate, laura at the end of august. Incidentally, I don't have internet access at the new house yet so I'm writing this from Bree and Kevin's.

Tom has turret's syndrome. Amazingly enough he is one of the good cases that actually says words and phrases rather than just making noise. Did I mention that he's an actor? You'd think that would be tough for him but he tells me that he's never twitched during a performance. Sadly though his condition is the most interesting thing about him. He's a pastor's son who was big into Metal when he was in high school, the word "sheltered" doesn't begin to cover it. I'm quickly coming to wish that he would just not talk to me anymore. It seems like everything he says pisses me off. He's one of those people who's always just waiting for his turn to speak. Like the other day when I said something about hating hippies he asked me why I hate them. (It should be noted the while I say that I hate hippies, what I actually hate is reactionary alarmist crusaders who are out to save the world though they have no idea how to do it, the ones that chant slogans and think that amnesty international is the greatest thing since peanut butter.) After I get done telling him what is in the preceding parentheses he starts to tell me what he thinks about hippies. It started with "yeah, the drug use isn't so bad but..." I would tell you what else he said, but I stopped him right there. Was it sort of mean to cut him off? Yes it was. Would I have slapped him if he had kept talking? Probably. If someone wants to give me there opinion I wish they'd just do it and not beat around the bush like that. I guess when it comes down to it what really annoys me is that Tom wants so badly to be/sound wise, but everything he says sounds like he's quoting somthing he read minutes earlier. The funniest times are when he says something to me that I told him.

Christina. She was the catalyst of the crazy magnet epiphany. When we moved into the new house she and Tom were seeing each other. What I've found out since then is that she's had her eye on me for some time now. This wouldn't be so horrible if it had been revealed to me at a more opportune moment than when I was drunk. As it was we ended up making out which I thought was sure to cause more than a little trouble. No, Tom was fine with it when he found out. Apparently she and he have been operating on a pass system for some time. These passes allowed them to make out with people they chose with no consequences. Christina had decided to use one on me and in my inebriated state I fell prey. As per usual I hate myself for it now. After that, Tom and Christina broke up and I had the unfortunate duty of explaining to Christina that we just couldn't be. For one thing we live together. Moving in together is a step that is long down the road in a relationship, messing with roomates is just a bad idea.

Thomas. Where to begin? Well, he's gay, which I had always thought might be kind of awkward. However with Tom and Christina in the house he is actually one of the less awkward roomates. He's quiet, competent, and proficient at basic household problem solving. I find his demeanor very refreshing as he is a gay man who has resisted the urge to act the way society says gay people should (see "queer eye" for five examples of that particular stereotype). I guess I don't have much more to say about him, which is a good thing.

Moppy. My little brother. Not really but that's what we're telling everyone. He's definately my favorite roomate and seems to have many of the same female troubles that I do which makes for some interesting conversation. Laid back about almost everything, he knows how to take life not so seriously.

So that's the rundown on the new roomates. You'll note the first two are really long because there's alot to complain about. The later half is short because I really like them and it's harder to come up with reasons for that.

We pursue that which retreats from us. That's what I told Moppy last night about the girl he's into. It's a hard situation to be in. What we want always seems to be just beyond our grasp. That's the lesson I've always been taught anyway.
The adendum to that lesson is that sometimes you don't realize how important something is to you until it's gone.

Today I sat on my front stoop and had a good long think. I started off thinking about J'Nee, one of the girls I work with who has expressed an interest in being more than just work aquaintances, and more that just friends as well. I suppose it's my own fault for listening to her woes. I tried to help her out with a guy she liked but it didn't work out. After that I think her attention switched to me. She's very nice, and cute, but there is something missing from the whole situation. She continues to press the issue though I maintain that what she really wants and needs is a good boy who can be bad, not vice versa. I think I'm vice versa.

The long think didn't stay on J'nee for very long. Thoughts turned to Bonnie. And on that subject I guess there's not much more to be said. I miss her. It's been so long. If I saw her again would it be the same? Would my heart still skip like it used to? Would my eyes say the same words they always did back then and hang on her every move like a desert nomad to his canteen? I wish I knew.