I'm tired of having to fit in these stupid boxes, but I really don't know what to do about it. I'm sick of being measured against 5 million other people in areas that almost everyone is better than me. Everyone has special skills, everyone is weird in one way or another but standardized test don't measure any of that. They just measure all the crap we know aboutthe english language. A language that is one of the most malleable and rule breaking in the world. I write in english, and I break writitng rules constantly. But rarely does anyone care. But when you get to the tests it's extremely important to have all your commas apostraphes and periods in the proper spot, with no respect for art and metaphor or diction, or sequencing. Just shove it all neatly in a box and forget it. Nothing I ever write seems destined for greatness anyway so why not file it? Because I don't write for other people, I don't write to get published, I write because I need to, I need to write to maintain what little sanity I am left with. I'm writing this now in a flurry of keystrokes that have little meaning in and of themselves, but put together they convey the message of my angst and dissatisfaction with the world. My words have power. Not great power to move the world, but power enough to communicate, and that is a great power. But enough of angst and my own dissatisfaction with life. On to the good things in life. Friends are good to have, good friends are even better. It seems to me lately that i have quite a few good friends and it scares me that at the end of this year I might lose quite a few of them. But truth be told it is one of the few inevitable adventures that I have left to overcome. Katie seems to be having a bad day, and I'm definitely not helping. I'm trying to not be annoying, but i don't think I'm succeeding very well. I still can't figure out my whole infatuation-with-bree thing. I'll just give it more time, maybe it will resolve itself. Maybe I'm just a coward and afraid to take a chance. yeah, I think it's probly that second thought. I still haven't gotten Joe anything for his birthday, I know him better than anyone and I can't think of what to get him. Gotta go to work today, I have to get out of practice to go too. Oh well, these things happen.