Ok, so I've decided to do this, and maybe someone else will read it. but what the hell, such a thing is practically inevitable. so yeah.

this is probly going to mostly be about what happened last night. But in order to do that I would have to get into the things that have come before, so here it goes...

In a nutshell. I tried out for the production of "A midsummer Night's dream," and it was loads of fun, but I anticipated that, the thing I didn't forsee happening was Falling for one of the crew members. who shall for the moment remain nameless. But that's not the issue, I managed to keep what I felt a secret for a long long time, mainly by not telling anyone. But then, in a typical school girl manner, I had to tell someone, and so I got laughed at. Maybe for someone else falling for someone is a trivial thing, something that happens every week/day/hour, but it seems that when I fall, I go down hard. So finnally I try to tell her how I feel. But I fuck it up (as per usual) I just can't get across the depth of emotion I'm going through, so needless ot say I kinda get a bit of a brush off.

but that's all there is to say about that, I probly have skewed some of it just because of the shitty way I feel right now.

Now on to the true story. Short it is. So Jackson has his bonfire last night, which is all well and good, and I have a good time, mostly because the people who showed up are way cool people, and I like them. But it becomes apparent, that while it was all well and for bree to be close to me before. Now it's like I go fucking leprosy or something. So I spend the rest of the night trying not to mind too much. But still, it sucks.

S oI get the overall feeling that the walls of life are about to crash down around me, yay... Fun. that aught to do it for my bitch session today, but I'm sure I'll have more later....